My journey of coming to peace with death
Death is one of those topics that people do not feel very comfortable talking about, yet I think it is one of the most important things to come to terms with in life. My journey in this topic was taking me from one end of the scale to the total opposite. I could say it was a deep initiation, since partly I experienced it through the loss of my parents with 18 years gap in between and with a huge difference in my consciousness, too.
To see how huge the change was in my life in this topic, we need to go back to the time when I was around 8-9years old, when I regularly cried myself to sleep. " What if I will not wake up?" Every time I thought of death, this crippling fear took over me, feeling that once I die, I will be lost infinitely in this huge, endless universe. Infinite for a little girl felt way too big and long. I was brought up in a Catholic family, so this life for me was supposed to be the only one.
Of course, now I know that is not the case at all.
This experience went on for a few years. At the same time, the older I got, the more I rebelled against going to church, I just did not feel right about it. When I was 18 years old, I watched a 6hrs movie of Peter Brook called Mahabharata. It is a Hindu epos clearly stating the existence of reincarnation. It felt very comforting and gave me a peace of mind, but being a teenager I was not really looking into it any further at the time.
The next step was in 2000 when my Dad was diagnosed with cancer, while I was living in England carrying my first baby in my womb. Towards his final days I had to go back to Hungary to help my Mum to look after him, while she was at work. I spent a month with my Dad. It was an interesting teaching about life and death, since we had similar “symptoms” growing tummy and lot of nausea and while I was having those due to carrying a baby, giving a new life, he was losing his. He shared his visions he had of the other world, which is pretty common reaching towards the final days of an incarnation. So I came as close as I could to the other world through him. Since I was coming to the 8th months of my pregnancy by then, I had to leave him behind 10 days before crossing over, as otherwise I could not have flew back to England to give birth where I lived at the time. It was the hardest decision I had to make.
At the time I was dormant, totally not knowing anything about spirituality. I could not overcome the loss of my Dad for 5 years, whom I loved very dearly. I could not speak about him without crying. So I went to a healer, who helped me release this deep grief and loss I could not release from within. She pretty much set me on the path of becoming a healer myself. Few years later, my best friend’s husband died in my arms of cancer, I guess God was giving me a chance to experience through him, what I could not do with my Dad. It was a blessing.
My awakening started in 2007, when I returned home to Hungary after my divorce and it was quite a rapid awakening. I started to read loads of books about reincarnation. I had a teacher at the time who held a death meditation. I thought it was a strange idea, yet the experience was totally unexpected. I watched myself die in a meditative state. I could see my soul sitting on the clouds, swinging my legs (light body), staring at my own funeral not understanding why my family is so sad, as I am happy, and totally alive and actually, finally at home (other world). That experience changed my perception of death. Then as my real journey as a healer started after 2014, I started to have visions of my past lives (more like parallel as in the universe there is no time), so by then there was no doubt that the soul carries on living over and over.
I went to see an astrologist many years ago, probably in 2013 and she told me, that part of my role in this life will be to help souls to come to Earth and also help the journey of the ones, who are leaving. The first one manifested very quickly when I started to work as a healer in a fertility center, where women came for help when doctors said there is no hope for a baby. We proved the contrary quite a few times. But helping people to cross over, that I did not see how I could do. One thing I have learnt by then, that whatever my soul decided to experience here on Earth will come to me in due time. And it did.
But before we get there, I ought to share, that I went on the Heart Light teacher’s course about Archangels, where we also learnt about the archangel of death and of crossing over. On that course we had to connect to all the archangels we learnt about and feel their energy. Most of my life death was depicted as a hangman in black cape with a scythe, fearful, mean and scary. The archangel of death and of crossing over however both had the most beautiful white light vibration and the most gentle loving energy. I was deeply touched. If they are present when we cross over, that can only be a beautiful experience. Shortly after that, I had a client, who had clair vision and she was regularly visited by Death, not with the gentle, loving energy I described above. We need to understand, that in our multidimensional reality everything has a lower and higher vibrational version. So death on a lower vibration might be black and scary, but if you connect to the higher vibrational, more loving version, it is a different experience all together. Just like you can connect to Jesus through the image shown by the church, the suffering, with the thorn crown, or you can choose to connect to the beautiful ascended master of Christ consciousness and meet his gentle, joyful, even playful loving energy. So, we did a healing session for this client and I helped her to connect to the higher vibration of Death. It was beautiful to see the change it brought into her life. No doubt one day she will be helping souls to cross over, too.
So, returning to my life and supporting crossing over, 18 years after my father passed away, my Mum fell in her home and pretty much struggled for another 7 months before she passed away. I accompanied her all the way through that journey. I did not know how to do it, but yet I felt I did all I had to do, I was guided. Just like I never learnt how to help souls to connect to their mothers to be (it just awakened in me). So, the day my Mum passed away the Archangel who helps crossing over, came to me while I walked my dog in the morning and said “It is time”. When I went to the hospital, I could feel / see Mum’s soul sitting outside the body on the bed. She was still alive, but hardly in her physical body. In the evening, people had to leave the hospital, but the nurses told me I can stay, they could see the obvious, that Mum was leaving soon. I was sent out on the corridor for a few minutes while they cleaned the patients. There was no one there, but suddenly a white butterfly started to fly around me. Being the symbol of the soul, I knew it was another message, that the time is close. I went back to my Mum, by then it was 9pm, when I got a message from my younger son, that he has a very high temperature, I should go home. I knew that was my Mum telling me, she does not want me to be there. I spoke to her soul, I did all that I felt that I could do and said my final good bye. She crossed over before midnight. Next day my teacher sent me a message that she got from my Mum. I knew she is ok. After that, we could connect very easily, she told me things and even now, after a couple of years I can ask her, if I need help. Our connection is more beautiful, than it has ever been while in physical form. After she crossed over, I could talk about her with a smile and gratitude, unlike with my Dad, that took 5 years. I just lived the whole experience on a different level of consciousness and spiritual awareness.
The reason I called it an initiation earlier was because I had to support Mum to cross over 10 days before my teacher Erika Bartha, held the first course how to support people to cross over. That is the Infinite soul workshop, that I regularly hold. She confirmed most steps that I intuitively felt and did. Since then, when I am asked, I support people - mostly on a soul level - in crossing over smoothly. It is the most beautiful, humble experience.
My Mum’s funeral was a celebration of her homecoming to the other world and of who she was on Earth. My divine guides channeled a beautiful speech to me for her funeral and although it was a deeply spiritual approach, in the midst of a Catholic ceremony, many of my Catholic relatives said after the funeral, that it was the most beautiful funeral they have been to. I just gave them a different perspective of life and death.
Took me most of my life to figure death out and come to peace with it. I am really grateful to my parents, that they have taught me how different it can be to lose someone. It really only depends on our consciousness and belief system, our openness to the divine energies and our heart. Grief is still there, I am not saying I have not cried, I missed my Mum. Grief is the natural healing process of loss, even if that is only the loss of physical contact. However, the difference in the experience within me was huge. I cannot even compare the two. With my Dad I was devastated, with Mum I respectfully supported her on a journey, with loving acceptance. And grief was a gentle process of letting go, with a total peace in my heart, knowing that I have not really lost her. The soul is infinite and we will meet again for sure.
Life here on Earth is just a short experience in the infinite, multidimensional journey of the soul. All people should know this, because we all deserve to know, that death is all about returning home, to our divine home and we are here to learn to love, to have a better experience in the other world.
If you want to know more about the topic of life and death, the other world, join one of the Infinite soul workshops where I talk about it through my own experiences. I can only say it is lifechanging. Especially recommended to people, who – just like I used to be – are frightened of the idea of death and have no concept of a future after death. Also highly recommended for healers, professionals working with the elderly, or those who are about to or have just lost their loved ones. Finally for all the awakened people who consciously want to cross over, when the time comes, without pain, drama, a beautiful intentional crossing over. When you do that, death truly becomes beautiful.
You can listen to a short video about the same workshop on the link below:
Lots of love and light
Nóra Hormay
Heart Light Healer
Ascension wayshower
www.angelicrainbow.com